Forever My Loyalties Shall Lie
by xEtERNAl.wiNgSx
Summary: One Shot. three months have passed since Severus murdered the headmaster he respected greatly. how does he handle the guilt?


Three months, three months had it been since the most powerful wizard had died in his hands.

All those hateful glares from members of the Order in the Daily Prophet told him well enough: He betrayed them. They now have a sufficient reason to detest him for his revolting demeanor. He was never to be forgiven. Harry Potter swore that Severus Snape would be one of the people he shall destroy along with Voldemort.

If only Potter could understand. But he's not supposed to.

Severus Snape hated himself more than anything else in the whole world. He began killing various wizards and witches from a tender age of sixteen, proud of the black tattoo etched on his skin that showed a skull with the tongue of a snake. "A talented Death Eater" Voldemort called him. How can that very mission three months ago be any different than the others?

Albus Dumbledore is murdered.

_xxx_

_"I trust you, Severus." _

_Sitting alone in his office, he waits. _

_Professor Flitwick came rushing in, screaming something about Death Eaters in the castle. The time had come, Severus knew sure enough. Tightening his fists, he raised his wand and stupefied his colleague. _

_"I'm sorry, Filius." _

_He ran into Hermione Granger and Luna Lovegood over at his door. He told the two girls that Professor Flitwick had collapsed in his office and they should take care of him. He was left with no choice but to lessen the amount of victims. _

_Finally, the time has come. He had to do what he promised. _

xxx

"Crucio."

It wasn't his job. It wasn't assigned to him. All of it was, after all, none of his business.

"Crucio."

He and Draco were writhing on the floor. Severus could hear him weeping, his grey eyes letting out blood curdling screams for help. Poor child, Draco wasn't him. As much as the blond boy resembled him, he was still different from that black haired boy who shut himself in his dark room, crying and wishing he was dead. He wasn't capable of killing, for Draco still had wisps of innocence within his heart. He could still turn back and go to the light.

Yet, it was too late. Innocence left Draco too quickly, too soon.

The fault fell to no one but him.

The agonizing pain had stopped. Draco had fallen unconscious next to him. Voldemort's dead gaze was fixed on him as whispered a soft, "Well done, Severus." He couldn't look up to receive the praise, for his mind was full of nothing but the soothing voice of the Headmaster. As much of an accomplished Occlumens he was, he felt as if he was about to fail on preserving the emotions to himself.

He betrayed the people who tried to trust him. He threw his conscience away and killed the man who closely resembled a loving father he always wanted. Severus lost everything he once had for nothing but to prove that he was doing exactly what he promised Narcissa Malfoy under the Vow. All he received was a simple "well done."

His sacrifice wasn't worth it.

Albus Dumbledore is dead.

xxx

_Severus stood up from his seat, outraged. _

_"Albus, you're taking too much for granted!" _

_"Your life is more important than mine." _

_"Is it?" Severus narrowed his eyes. _

_"I can't offer as much help to the Order as you can." _

_How could he offer help when he's the cold-blooded murderer of the man leading the Order? _

_"I believe in you, Severus." _

_Dumbledore's mind was open for Severus to look into. He wasn't joking, Dumbledore believed in him. _

_"Promise me, please." _

_After so many years, Severus had to swear his allegiance by staining his hands with blood once more. _

xxx

Draco was full of bruises from continuously slamming his body against the floor, trying to lessen the pain. It was the young Slytherin's first time to get punished, to bear the Dark Mark clearly on his left hand, and the first time to see someone die in the hands of another.

Draco Malfoy will never be the same again.

xxx

_Severus despised himself. It was a command – no, a plea. Dumbledore was begging him, the poor old man was begging for his death. Severus sold his soul to the Devil, he loathed the idea, for he knew he would never get it back. _

_The way Albus Dumbledore called his name shredded every vein in his body to pieces. _

_From that moment on, his life for was blinded eternally by the murderous green light. _

xxx

He ruined too many lives. His mother, Dumbledore, even Draco. One's who cared for him were torn. All the people he ever loved had died.

Enough.

Albus Dumbledore is murdered.

He killed Albus Dumbledore.

Rain was beating down on to his black frock coat. The rain felt like sharp arrows piercing into his body one by one, as if the merciless skies were chastising him.

Albus Dumbledore is dead.

Warm liquid was sliding down Severus' face; it was either the rain or his tears, maybe both.

Waves of excruciating pain scorched Severus' left arm.

No one is going to listen to this pathetic creature's explanation.

A Dark Mark was fired into the bleak sky.

Forever in silence he shall ever lie.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters or spells, Rowling does.**

**A/N: I hope everyone likes it…. One shot is seriously hard to write, I have to admit, it's quite a challenge (to me, at least.) **

**Please review! Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated too. If you don't like it, you should tell me so I could improve in the future :D Even if it's a word or two, please review so I know that you've read this fan fic! **


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